charing lang!!

Excellent! Nakakatuwa at magaling ang topic mo Reynz. It would be really cool dahil pinagdaanan mo rin at ang higit sa lahat, makakapagbigay lakas loob ka sa mga duwag na katulad ko – to take chances.

Haaay buhay! *Palakpak*

my last lecture would be all about the behind the scenes of all the risks that I tried and the fact that I was not afraid to try them and I was ridiculously hard headed that I dared not listen to my friends.

my last lecture would be to tell people that it pays to take risks no matter if you lose financially for money is immaterial, what’s important is that you can prove how strong relationships are despite the most challenging moments in life. Just like what Pausch said, these blocks keeps the “other” people away. meaning, with the risks that I tried, I found out that those relationships that i thought were for real? were just nothing but built on sand. boy, was i mistaken.

my last lecture will talk about the lessons about life. the life that I traversed. how i hid behind the cloth of manly manly man, who chickened out at the reality because i succumed to society’s pressure to who i should be when I am not, then finally coming out strong and realized that i missed a lot – shame on me for being a victim of my own cowardice!

my last lecture will talk about:
- my mentors, strangers who sort of adopted me, guided me and provided me the “flashlight” that i’ve been making some jokes
- my best friends who has some interesting perceptions of the fact that i am not like them, but that we’re able to circumnavigate the differences and still exist and be close as friends
- and how i will accept what’s due me because of blatant failures in my likfe
- and lastly, i’d talk about how crazy and funny i had become because of the situation i was put into.

Did you notice something?

My last lecture will bore you to death with all my blah blah blah blah blah blah blah…..

kagagawan to ni chuvaness! hahaha! di ako ang me kasalanan nyan ano? hahaha

putcha naman – nagmukha tuloy akong santa santita sa entry ketch. puro naman pala lukrecia kasilag ang dating ditetch! si bluep kasi – siryus eh, nahawa tuloy aketch!

pag nagpa-SANTA CRUZAN ka chuvaness, ako ang hahawak ng lampara sa harap ng reyna okay — pero gusto ko, may korona din ako.. ano ko, papatalo – - heheh!!

I could only imagine your lecture, complete with costume and glitters and a magic wand! hahahah

My lecture would be about ME, MYSELF and I. Alam ko kase na I can be an inspiration to others. Nyahahah. Ang hangin.

Seriously, my lecture would be about success — life, career and everything. kung paanong ang pinanganak na mahirap ay mamamatay ng mayaman…nyahahahha

eto talaga, seryos na, my last lecture would be about PASSION FOR GOD, COMPASSION FOR PEOPLE

Pag-uwi ko pla kanina, mali ang pinasukan kong exit – as in, instead of 295 going to Jersey, ewan ko kung anong pinasukan ko dahil pag liko ko, bumulaga nalang saken ang Walt Whitman Bridge going to Philadelphia, eh, pag nag-uturn ako, sa river ang bagsak ko, kaya umuwi na lang ako! Neks time! Sa day-off kooo!!!

now – there it is.

God loves you Reyna!

i knew you’d say something deep! it’s like the blocks that Pausch is talking about it – yours is the triumph over those blocks or odd as Pausch had said, that’s to keep the “other” people away.

My focus will be the moment that I realize His love for me knew no bounds. I may be a sinner or a saint but I am loved by Him in the same exact way.

This is my story. During the time that I was so confused about my sexuality and my faith, I got to know an Irish monk who became God’s instrument in helping me reconcile my faith and my sexuality. We would take long walks along the monastery grounds in the middle of winter and discuss why I had a hard time accepting that God loves me because of my sexuality and what other people made me believe – that being gay is a sin.

One winter snowy night, he gave me a one-on-one retreat. He had me sit in the middle of the chapel and played some background music for ambiance I guess. Then, he had me close my eyes and told me to imagine three chairs. I being seated in the middle.

While I pictured this in my head, he had me think of all the good things that I have done in my 24 years of being alive. I saw myself glistening in bright light knowing that the good actions that I had done were pleasing to Him. I saw myself as bright as the sun. The monk then instructed me to look at the chair on the right and imagine God sitting right there. He wanted me to tell him what God’s reaction was to MY GOOD SELF. I saw God’s face with this radiant smile and His hands outstretched in welcome to embrace me. It was an ecstatic sight.

By this time, I was already in tears. Similarly, the monk then asked me to think about the bad things that I have done in my 24 years. I saw my being gay as one of the bad things and I pictured myself as dirty, dark, gloomy and sinful. I was ashamed, I couldn’t even stare at my own image because of that. Then, the monk said, “Now look at the chair on the left and imagine God sitting there. Tell me what you see.”

I looked to my left and to my surprise, I saw the same exact face of God with his radiant smile and his outstretched hands ready to welcome me. I cried even more knowing that God did not care. He didn’t care whether I was a sinner or I was a saint, straight or gay, man or woman. He loved me regardless of all of that. At that exact moment, I accepted my sexuality and was able to reconcile it with my faith knowing full well that God’s love knows no bounds. I would like to impart the moment I knew what God’s Love felt like and how, in our own choosing could we understand its fullness.

“Beloved, let us love one another. For love is of God, and everyone that loveth is born of God and knoweth God. He that loveth not, knoweth not God – for God is love.”