Overcoming Fear of Failure

Shohada,

As I was reading your email, your feelings are very clear as to the outcome of whatever project that you’re doing. It seemed to me that you’re smart and intelligent – heck, you’re a professor. But consider this. In whatever endeavor you do, business – personal – educational, there are only 2 sides of the coin. Either you succeed or you fail. All of us wants to succeed, there’s no debate there. Now, what happens when you fail? This is your fear.

You had a great idea on the curriculum that you presented to the Board of Regents. They took it, implemented it and succeeded. Unfortunately, you were so scared of the outcome you left. So, wa ka biyaya nang success mo because they have it. Whereas, nagdurusa ka ngayon sa lugar mo as you said. Naku, mababato kita nang arinola! Grrrr!

Anak, not all successful people were successful in everything that they do. Eh si Trump nga, pumalpak sa casino business nya eh. Madami pa dyan. Ako?! Eto pumalpak sa internet. It’s not the failure that counts, but it’s how you rise up after failing that matters.

Now, going back to your project, execution is the key word and I’m sure you know what I mean. Then, just stay put, i-mitigate mo ang mga darating na problema para kahit pumalpak ka, hindi masakit. It’s risk management. Lastly, wag kang matakot. Stand for what you believe in. Success or fail, be proud that you took the risk, at me ginawa ka instead of nothing. NOW, here’s a very nice article on overcoming failure. This is for you.

OVERCOMING FAILURE 

Fear of failure is one of the greatest fears people have. Fear of failure is closely related to fear of criticism and fear of rejection. Successful people overcome their fear of failure. Fear incapacitates unsuccessful people. 

The Law of Feedback states: there is no failure; there is only feedback. Successful people look at mistakes as outcomes or results, not as failure. Unsuccessful people look at mistakes as permanent and personal.

Buckminster Fuller wrote, “Whatever humans have learned had to be learned as a consequence only of trial and error experience. Humans have learned only through mistakes.”

Most people self-limit themselves. Most people do not achieve a fraction of what they are capable of achieving because they are afraid to try—because they are afraid they will fail.

Take these steps to overcome your fear of failure and move yourself forward to getting the result you desire:

Step One: Take action. Bold, decisive action. Do something scary. Fear of failure immobilizes you. To overcome this fear, you must act. When you act, act boldly.

Action gives you the power to change the circumstances or the situation. You must overcome the inertia by doing something. Dr. Robert Schuller asks, “What would you do if you knew you could not fail?” What could you achieve? Be brave and just do it. If it doesn’t work out the way you want, then do something else. But DO SOMETHING NOW.

Step Two: Persist. Successful people just don’t give up. They keep trying different approaches to achieving their outcomes until they finally get the results they want. Unsuccessful people try one thing that doesn’t work and then give up. Often people give up when they are on the threshold of succeeding.

Step Three: Don’t take failure personally. Failure is about behavior, outcomes, and results. Failure is not a personality characteristic. Although what you do may not give you the result you wanted, it doesn’t mean you are a failure. Because you made a mistake, doesn’t mean that you are a failure.

Step Four: Do things differently. If what you are doing isn’t working, do something else. There is an old saying, “if you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you always got.” If you’re not getting the results you want, then you must do something different. Most people stop doing anything at all, and this guarantees they won’t be successful.

Step Five: Don’t be so hard on yourself. Hey, if nothing else, you know what doesn’t work. Failure is a judgement or evaluation of behavior. Look at failure as an event or a happening, not as a person.

Step Six: Treat the experience as an opportunity to learn. Think of failure as a learning experience. What did you learn from the experience that will help you in the future? How can you use the experience to improve yourself or your situation? Ask yourself these questions:

(1) What was the mistake?

(2) Why did it happen?

(3) How could it have been prevented?

(4) How can I do better next time?

Then use what you learned from the experience to do things differently so you get different results next time. Learn from the experience or ignore it.

Step Seven: Look for possible opportunities that result from the experience. Napoleon Hill, author of Think and Grow Rich, says “every adversity, every failure and every heartache carries with it the seed of an equivalent or a greater benefit.” Look for the opportunity and the benefit.

Step Eight: Fail forward fast. Tom Peters, the management guru, says that in today’s business world, companies must fail forward fast. What he means is that the way we learn is by making mistakes. So if we want to learn at a faster pace, we must make mistakes at a faster pace. The key is that you must learn from the mistakes you make so you don’t repeat them.

Although we all make mistakes, fear of failure doesn’t have to cripple you. As self-help author Susan Jeffers says, “feel the fear and do it anyway.

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By: sho-ha-da registered: 3/25/2006 member Philippines

Mahal na Reyna,

Hi muli sa yo…

Mayroon lang akong iku-consult sa iyo. Kasi parang, heto nanaman ako’t kinakabahan sa ginawa ko…

Marami na kasi akong projects na upon its conception, nagflo-flow ang idea, tuloy-tuloy, ang ganda-ganda. Pero pag naaaprub na ito, parang kinakabahan na ako sa implementation, baka sumablay.

Parang nawawalan kasi ako ng tiwala sa sarili ko kapag naiisip ko ang mga decision ko para sa personal or family life, kasi karamihan doon, pinagsisihan ko bandang huli. Example, ang pagbili ng bahay sa Cavite, ang pag re-resign ko sa banko, at lately ang pagpunta ko rito sa UAE(mabuti na lang novercome ko na ang homesickness).

Isa sa mga examples ng projects na ginawa ko, that I dreaded (like,papano kung maaapprove at papano kung hindi mag succeed sa implementation), ay yong ginawa ko na isang course sa Business Administration that will replace Banking and Finance, para sa isang unibersidad na pinagtuturuan ko sa Pinas at nagsilbi bilang department chairman.

Kauna-unahan ito sa Pilipinas, ang title ng degree ay BSBA in Finance and Treasury Management.

I-prinisent ko ito sa Curriculum Committee and to the University Council, at nang malaman kong OK sa kanila, without revision actually, doon ako kinabahan. Hanggang sa maapprove ito ng Board of Regents (May autonomy ang univ. kaya hanggang sa kanila lang ang approval wala nang CHED).

Natakot ako, papaano kung matuloy ito, at hindi ako makahatak ng mga estudyanteng enrollees dito. E, nasa department ko itong magiging course na ito…. mapapahiya ako.

Isa ito sa naging factor para magdecide akong mag-abroad….

Lately, nalaman ko sa dean that this has been offered this school year at mayroon agad two sections na nag-enroll… Nakahinga ako ng maluwag… Imagine, kahit pala hindi ko siya iniwan, di rin pala ako mapapahiya… nagdusa tuloy ako rito sa ME.

Ngayon heto na naman ako sa ganitong situwasyon:

Nagdraft ako ng promotional plan para sa branch namin (padalahan kami ng pera). Naipresent ko na sa management, approved na siya. Gumagawa na ako ngayon ng action plan… Pero, heto nanaman ang kabug sa dibdib ko…

Papano kung hindi ito magwork? Papano kung di matupad ang target na si-net ko? Papano kung di kagatin ng mga tao? Marketing-related ito… hindi ko ito linya… ito ang pinakamababa kong grade sa masters ko… Kaya lang makati lang ang utak ko, kaya pinangahasan kong gawin.

Ngayon, parang tinatabangan na akong ituloy. Kaya lang kasubuan na, at hinihingian na ako ng requirements ng management…

There is no way out, ika nga.

Mahal na reyna… papano ko ba i-oovercome itong ganitong pakiramdam ko? Parang kung hawak ko lang ang passport ko, bibili na agad ako ng ticket at uuwi na ako bukas.

Salamat in advance… di ko ito masabi sa misis ko kasi, pagtatawanan na naman ako noon. Baka mawalan na ng respeto sa akin yon.

Give me some advice, please… kahapon lang nagtytype ako ng post ko para sa iyo, may piece of mind pa ako. Pero nang matanggap ko e-mail mula HO na kailangan na nila ang requirements at ang action plan… parang biglang nagturn around ang mundo ko…
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